Confession

I secretly...
... want to move back in with my parents.
... don't like studying business.
... want to marry a scientist or a pastor... or a pastor scientist!

I not so secretly...
... have been studying Russian.
... can't wait to go back home to West Virginia!

I proudly...
... fell in love with ultimate frisbee.
... will be attending the final Resolved conference this weekend!

Thanks for letting me get that off my chest :) 

Resolved has been one of the best experiences in my Christian life.  So much wisdom is poured down our throats, soothing our souls, filling our spirits, cleansing our minds, encouraging our hearts, and changing our passions.  This is The.Last.One. and I'm sad.  But God will continue to bless young adult Christians through other means, I'm sure. He always does His will and we can rest in that.  Sorry I'm random and short today, but that's kind of normal.  This post is totally off the cuff, unlike my normal ponder-for-hours-before-posting ordeal. I just wanted to encourage you to do one of two things:

A - Come to Resolved!  Day passes are available but coming for the whole weekend would be most beneficial.  You can register here.
B - If you can't come, livestream!  Here at work, it's fun to walk around the building during Resolved and Shepherd's conference because it's almost like surround sound; everyone has the livestream up and blasting!

See ya!

Dependence on God

A friend sent this to me a while back. It has been of great benefit and I thought I'd pass it on.

Acts 17:28 - For in Him we live and move and exist, as even some of your own poets have said, ‘For we also are His children.’
Romans 11:36 - For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be the glory forever. Amen
Colossians 1:16 - For by Him all things were created, both in the heavens and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities— all things have been created through Him and for Him.

Reality
Dependence on God is our actual state but not our natural perception.


Perceived?
Are you aware of your dependence on God?
No: Ignorant rebellion - Get educated!
Yes: continue...

Surrendered?
Do you yield your will to His and trust His plan?
No: Willful rebellion - Repent!
Yes: continue...

Outlook
What is your attitude toward this yielding?
Negative: Willful rebellion - Re-examine your surrender
Neutral: Negative outlook in disguise - Re-examine surrender
Positive: Correct Christian mindset - Continue to trust in God!

Jeepers

So many people have labeled my actions as 'creepy' the past few weeks. Now I'm really concerned. Do I scare away strangers? Is this why I'm single? Can I change? Is Facebook to blame or is it just the way I am?

Do you think I'm creepy?

In other news, I just bought two frisbees. One is regulation, the other is 10g heavier because it has LED lights in it for nighttime games!! I'm VERY excited. I've been playing ultimate frisbee for a few weeks now and have gotten multiple bruises, lacerations, and bent back fingernails. It's all fun and games til I get hurt, then it's WAR! Hahaha I do really enjoy the game. It's a great workout and fellowship with the folks of my Bible study. If you wanna join us, let me know and I'll tell you when and where!

Off to bed because of a big day tomorrow: church and Disneyland!

TGIH___

I am constantly reminded of all the little things in life that make me happy and I've been making a list. The first time I heard of a "thank you list" was in my Bible class with Mrs Duron in 9th grade (I think it was 9th grade...). It was November (of course) and she had us make lists of 20 things we could thank God for. We all had the general stuff: Family, Bible, salvation, life. But then we had to get creative. One of the first things on my list? A hairbrush. Because that's one thing I wouldn't want to live without and I think everyone I interact with would agree. So I continue to make Thank God I Have ___ lists, lose them, and recreate them. But in the past week, God has given me many reminders of all the little graces in my life that He bestows with kindness and I don't even realize it! I have not one, but TWO hairbrushes! I have a steady job! I have running water! And I have friends that put up with my weirdnesses. I encourage you to make your own list of things you're thankful for, pray in gratefulness, lose the list, and start over again. It's a lesson in dependence on God's sovereignty and being thankful children.
Here's some things from my current list, to help you get started:

Beards
Babies
Bow ties
Suspenders
The moon
Bridget's laugh
Overalls
Lilies

Tigers
Flannel shirts
Walks in Awesometown
Colorful fingernail polish

Friendship bracelets

The tears of a groom

Holding Hands with a child

Daddy hugs

Being prayed for on the spot

Bonnets

Braids

Awkward moments

Mike's weird face

Jesse points

Chocolate chip pancakes on my birthday

Green eyes

Macro photography

Skewered food
Jello

Kittens

Huskies

Russians

Facebook

Awareness

Lo, what sweet despair doth push my bounds!
What agony doth caress my soul!
For depth of wound doth purify
And pain internal doth awake

Prithee, do not forsake thy daughter

Nor turn upon thy tormented sister
Gentle scorn doth wonders produce
Harsh love hath refreshing power
 
Hark, the song of joy is upon mine ear
The hope of love abounds within
Dost scar remain? A cherished reminder
I am saved
I am free

Know Your Epistomology

Some friends and I had a discussion at midnight over fries and Dr Pepper at our favorite local burger establishment. The topic of discussion was primarily centered around this post that my friend wrote.  He’s a very deep thinker, that Jesse.  But all of that discussion got me thinking… How do our perceptions of reality differ from reality? Can we ever fully and correctly perceive reality?  And is reality what is true?  That last question is my most important one for this reason:  The world we know, what we can observe and make empirical deductions based upon, is fallen. It is broken. It is not what it was meant to be.  Does this mean it is less true?  Is a sinful creation necessarily false? 

I know I should leave this type of thinking to the philosophy majors.  I don’t know what I’m talking about.  But that’s ok.  It happens a lot.

Cabbage soup vs Chipotle

So I was eating lunch with some co-workers today.  It was fun and we discussed things like "what would aliens think of our government fighting internally between elephants and donkeys?"  But then someone said that blogs are a waste of time and people should read books instead.  I was offended by that.  My friend Mrs M is an avid blogger and I so enjoy her insights on love, loss, life, laughter, and alliteration. She has a great perspective that I wish I could emulate. She's always encouraged me toward godliness and intelligence.  She's also the reason I have written somewhat more frequently on this blog since this time last year.  Now, if my good friend Mrs M were to write a book, I would definitely read it.  But I hope that it would be filled with short stories about her life experiences, each with a golden nugget of wisdom or funny outcome.  Because that is how I think of Mrs M.  She's not a drawn out single purpose tale, but a collection of adventures that always delight...

...but what WOULD aliens think of our politics?

Disco

Hey! It's 2012? When did that happen? Oh yeah, I was at the apartment of a friend of a friend when it happened. And it was a weird night.

I think it was the first time I'd been to what the world would call a party but I was surrounded by Christians. There was music, dancing, and alcohol, but I didn't see anyone getting drunk and inappropriate. So it was fun.

It was the first time I played twister with adults! So fun though! I won two outta three games :)

And regrettably, 1/1/12 was the first time I was seriously hit on by a Christian guy. He totally knew I've been in a very serious relationship for the last two years. But he would not stop asking me to dance. It was super awkward. But God helped me be gracious toward a brother and I kept steering the convo back to church and ministry and salvation truths. Those are much more fun than dancing with a stranger.

I am resolved once again to lose ____ pounds this year. I purchased a gym membership back in September and have been going pretty consistently for about a month or so now. I'm only eating out when with others, not just when it's convenient. And when I do eat out, I'm trying to choose the healthier options on the menu :)

I am resolved to do laundry on a more regular basis.

I am resolved to learn as much Arabic as I can.

I am resolved to grow as a young woman in the way a godly young woman should grow. To continue developing relationships with wiser women. To read more regularly books and scriptures that are edifying and challenging. To pray for the good of others and follow up on those prayers to see how God has answered. To be more feminine and learn the ways women are most efficient at what they do.

I'm so excited!!!